So Long, Farewell

And so we bid a fond farewell to the farm, at least for now.
No more morning hay tosses.
No more over-feeding Laire in hopes that she'll get too fat to jump on my face when I'm on the couch.
No more killing half-dead roosters...

Maybe it's not all bad that it's ending.
So until next time...
We bid you...
Adieu.



And in our soon-to-be filmed adaptation of this song,
Liesl will be played by Jenn (Ha. Champagne. Get it.)
Kurt will be played by Dana (Can't you see the resemblance?)
Brigitta will be played by Kelly (Cute, adorable, and running away from huge crowds of people. And the farm)

--Kelly (obviously, since I made Dana be Kurt)

Part IV:Andrew

"I think THIS one's the right one!"

Andrew doesn't like having his picture taken.

...But his muscles do!!!

"Seriously...stop"

"I'm going to punch you."

"...With these guns!"

Family portrait

Not everyone in the family cooperated very well.

Dana using Kelly as a surfboard.

Part III: Jimmy

Face-melting drum solo.

AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIWIIIIIIIIPEOUT

Pa-rum-papum-pum

Off to the baseball game after a hard day's work on the farm.

And I'm SUPER excited about it!!

My nickname on the team is "Herdsman"

The best part is that this was completely accidental. NOT STAGED.

Don't hurt the dino egg.

Too late. It's cracked.

P.s. Dana almost stole those overalls. Beware.

Part II: Jenn

Jenn getting ready for a night on the town with her hot military boyfriend.

Jenn kissing Mikey goodbye before work (and accidentally getting hair on her clean scrubs. oops.)

Rawr.

Eye spy a ghost.

Bedtime for Bonzo.

Part I: Ma and Pa

The following posts are part of a collection we like to call "Dress like your favorite Fenner."

Mama Fenner in her Saloon Barmaid dress, canoodling Mikey.

Mama Fenner reading. Shoeless of course.

Tom both on and off duty. He is buff.
Note: Cyborg in the corner.

Mikey walks across the bed.

Rooster No More

Dear Splendidly Fabulous Readers of Reads Ville,

It is time for me to convey the "Incident" from my brain. Kelly has already provided you with her half, now i shall give you mine. Morbid thoughts and all {my dad is attacking the cat with balled up paper towels} . . . put your seat belt on America.

Let me begin by telling you that i don't really remember much . . . just kidding.

Ok so as Kelly has told you before, she was tip toeing around doing the chores, which was unnecessary because i was awake when the sun cracked {more like lazered it was so bright} over the mountains into the window and straight through my retinas and into my brain. {didn't have the same effect like it did on John Travolta in Phenomenon} . . . ANYWAYS.

So i was battling Bea and Mikey for the None Butt in Face Award {i know that makes no sense, don't worry about it} when Kelly burst through {or walked through} the side door by the bath room that goes into the garage and told me i needed to come with her.

She told me that Rooster was just sitting there, and something had attacked it. I thought bob cat? or maybe a coyot . . . to this day we are not sure. We're thinking about getting CSI down here to see what they can figure out.

ANYWAYS - - we {me and kelly} made our way down the wood steps in the garage. out the side door . . . which the 2 barn cats were happily eating their breakfast . . . then across the green grass and up the hill to the chicken COOP.

AAANNNDDD there - - - THERE ==> on the ground at the far left in the pen was Rooster. Poor little moo. All helpless and lying down. Eyes closed, flickering open from time to time.

"MAN DOWN!!! MEDIC!!!" - i either said this out loud or in my head, i forget.

So i circled around the back and inspected the gaping bloody wound that seemed to infect the entire back of Roosters hind parts.

AND it began . . .

The call to Lauren. The search for the none existent SHARP axe and the lame none to be found chicken killing boom sticks {guns}.

Then we decided to axe it:

"i just don't want to axe it, what if it doesn't go all the way through"

"i'll axe it"

"i don't want you to have to axe it"

"i don't want YOU to have to axe it"

. . . . ten minuets later

"i just don't want to axe it, what if it doesn't go all the way through"

"i'll axe it"

"i don't want you to have to axe it"

"i don't want YOU to have to axe it"

i did think about the fact that if i did axe Rooster, the angle we were standing in would in fact be a target for flying guts ad limbs that might decided to catapult themselves at us from the force of the axe.

AND then it was shovel it into a bag . . . and freezer it.

and then back to the axe and then so on and so forth.

FINALLY - i wouldn't take "no shovel Rooster into the bag" and thought if Kelly had a shovel, then we could work together and use the shovels as chop sticks. bloody chop sticks.

IT WORKED!

Rooster in the bag . . . into the freezer and there he stands {sits}

we had to wash the shovels off . . . they had Rooster's blood oozing all over it. I think a kidney was left behind as well.

END